Posted by: irishmama78 | October 16, 2014

Lumpectomy

So I went in for the lumpectomy last Monday October 6th, I was scared to death, never in my life have I had a surgery, and I wasn’t happy one bit about this one.

But my thoughts going in was this is it, we are done after this………IS WHAT I THOUGHT!!! The surgery went perfect I truly felt as I was wheeled back to the operating room, the hands of all the people praying for me it was a very peaceful feeling, I did great in the surgery or so I was told, and I woke from anesthesia very well I just kinda opened my eyes and knew where I was, which was one of my biggest fears!!!
Recovery was rough, but the pain meds helped and so did a cardinals win against the dodgers!! As the week went on I got better but the pain meds really started making me sick to the point of puking so that wasn’t fun 😦
Friday came and I got the call from Dr. Neff, he said that the breast tissue they took out around the precancerous cells had spread to the breast tissue, again not the news I wanted or expected!!! He said our next step was genetic testing for the cancer gene, REALLY ARE YOU KIDDING ME I MIGHT HAVE A CANCER GENE IN ME and if it came back negative, which is what we want another lumpectomy and possibly radiation. If it came back positive a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgery!!! Not the best news to hear when you were thinking this was it!!!! I thought I was in the clear!!!!
More surgery are you kidding me……..FUCK!!!! Is all I could think of, bc it was the only word that expressed how I felt!!!! Again anger set in, I have to cancel being room mom in Chase’s kindergarten class which he and I were so excited about!! I had to cancel doing Chase and Bryce’s fall parties at school amoungst many other things. I am just PISSED that this crap is taking time away from my precious boys, I miss my cuddle, snuggle time bc they both can’t snuggle with me right now bc of my right side…..AGAIN taking away from my babies…..THIS FREAKING SUCKS!!!
I have had a whole new outlook on life since all this and it’s all about quality time, I don’t care about going out, material things or things that just plan don’t matter!!! It’s all about me getting healthy and moving forward!!
I WILL BEAT THIS AND IT WILL NOT GET ME DOWN!!!! There is a reason for this but I am patiently waiting for why??????

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Responses

  1. Love you. This is the “cancer” that my young friend that now lives in Chattanooga had. She didn’t have to do chemo and I don’t even know if she had to do radiation, but he did have a mastectomy. She said she felt more like a mastectomy survivor than a cancer survivor. Whatever it is I am glad that she is still here and actually on a 3 day walk on Stone Mountain this weekend with the Komen folks. I know her husband and little girl are more than glad! I love you for real Elisha!!! You are a feisty woman and come from fighting stock…you will do this with strength and grace and fear and trembling and tears and laughter, but you will not do it alone. god is with you and there are many of us that are here for you!

    • Thank you Marsha! That means the world to me!! Love you too!!!


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